Monday, February 11, 2008,3:35 PM
Ah Meng has died.
how sad.
i know, it was probably expected, what with her age, but it's still sad. most people probably thought that Ah Meng would be around forever. nobody thought about her death, except morbid freaks. Ah Meng was just so livable and healthy.
i think what endeared people to ah meng was the fact that she was almost human. forget the intelligence factor, although that's pretty outstanding too. Ah meng had feelings almost like a human, and that was so cool.
it's not like i knew ah meng personally. i never even took a photo with her. but ah meng was known for the singapore icon, and being singaporean meant that you have a special bond with ah meng the moment you're born. ah meng was older than my mum and almost as old as my dad. that meant quite a long life for an ape.
that's antoher thing. ah meng is an ape, right? but she looks so cute, even at an old age. she has a childish quality and that is just super.
sigh. i'll miss ah meng. i'm going to make a tribute to her on youtube. that's the least i can do other than totally redecorating my room with photos of ah meng, which is pretty drastic.
goodbye, ah meng. we'll miss you. TnT
##$$##
now that that's done with...
the last post ended with me being the monkey, right? so after that the mindless torture continued until fenta (told you he would pop out again) rescued me by telling them they were disgusting, bullying a girl.
i'm both grateful and ungrateful. why? 1.) i appreciate his helping but ticking them off for bullying a girl?? helloo?? where's the equality? you mean it's ok to bully as long as you bully a boy???
sheesh.
2.) i can't help but notice that he's like really cute, which doesn't really help at all.
ok wait. forget the cute part. just look at 1.). see the injustice of this world? SEE????
##$$##$$##
ok back to today.
there's this one guy, BJ, that i used to like but i gave up on him during the CNY holidays. i chose A. but today i find out that my friend's hiding a secret about BJ, and i think, just think, that she might like BJ and BJ might like her back.
i know, i shouldn't be bothered because i gave up on him and yada yada. but fact still remains that i have TOTALLY NO IDEA if i still like him!!
i keep on TELLING myself that i chose A and i feel good about my choice, but i cant help but keep on looking at him while he's donig PE!!! and every other time i run into him.
plus i keep getting butterflies in my stomach everytime i think of him and my friend together. a very bad feeling (jealousy?) erupted in my stomach.
it is not a pleasant sensation.
i just cant convince myself that not only is he my senior by 3 years but i, I, made the choice, not anyone else. there isn't anything to hide. i chose A, i tried to forget about BJ but...
nobody can just drop someone just like that. if only it were that easy.
it's bloody frustrating. it is, honestly, knowing that there's a guy you try not to like but still like might liek a friend of yours. i read about this stuff on Teenage and everything, but i never thought it would happen to me.
my friend refuses to tell me the secret. she says it'll affect my life dramatically. isn't she right.
i'm trying not to get my hopes up that by "affecting" my life dramatically, it means in a positive way instead of a negative way because if i do, i'll just feel more disappointed if my prophecy comes true.
besides, my friend says that BJ smsed her and if he liked me, why sms her instead of me?? there's no logic to the "positive" point.
and who WOULD like me? he's sec 4, for crying out loud. i wouldn't like a sec 1 if i were sec 4. ho would? you've got more mature girls at your beck and call.
sigh. i'm bringing myself down again. i feel so upset lately. A's been out of touch. i don't even know if he likes me. this BG thing is depressing. seriously depressing. i'm starting to think A as a hopeless case too.
*sigh*
i'm crying now. good grief.
i found an interesting statement from a fellow blogger and i think it's true. if you don't understand it, you're mentally sick.
Women are like police.
We can have all the evidence in the world, but we want the confession.
